- - - About this Blog and the Author - - -

March 17, 2010 - I found my old page with few of my old posts. It made me sad to see those abandoned words. I use to think I did not choose the words, they chose me. I feel bad to have abandoned them when they so kindly picked me. I will not abandon you anymore...


http://endlesssoftness.blogspot.com/2010/03/havent-written-in-years.html


Sunday, November 01, 2015

How autism has changed me

Last post I've published date back to 2012, so much has changed since then. Back in 2012 I had a 1 year old daughter and a 4 year old son with a moderate to severe speech delay for his age. I was not too concern, only was trying to deal with it believing he would no doubt get better as soon as he would enter school.

But he did not get better he continues to get significantly worst everyday and I do not expect this to realistic change anytime soon. Some of you might think am being negative or pessimistic. I am not, am being honest and realistic.

Autism has changed me, I wish I could tell you it made me a stronger person overall, it might of on some levels but overall it crushed me. I've became absolutely burned. It crushes me to see my son in emotional pain and meltdown continually. It is not normal to have a child almost completely uninterested and overwhelmed by the world that surrounds him.

Am not writing this to get pity even not for your sympathies am just tired to be burden by the illusion that we will come out of this flamboyant stronger and wiser. The truth is this sucks and not autism moms are superheroes.

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